In this episode, I play Richard Johnson, an old grandpa on the phone with scammers who are pretending to be working as federal DEA agents investigating crimes connected to my SSN. What they’re really doing is phishing for my personal information and trying to get me to send them money to clear my name. Things start to get a little bit wild when this scammer demands I go to Target to buy gift cards…
Call Synopsis: SSA Scam - Officer Charles Williams explains that there are illegal actions filed under Richard Johnson’s (Edmund) name for fraudulent activities and there is an arrest warrant out for him. There was a Toyota Corolla found in southern Texas with drugs inside, 10 bank accounts, and 15 credit cards opened using his SSN to launder money. They know Richard is innocent and his SSN has been compromised and are going to guide him through the steps to secure his assets without having to go through the process of freezing his bank accounts. The call is transferred to DEA Officer Ryan who proceeds to rush Richard to the bank to withdraw his money to purchase gift cards which they will exchange for a cashier's check he can deposit once he gets his new SSN tomorrow. Richard takes a while to get to the bank, exceeding speed limits and jamming out to some sick country bops. Once he gets to the bank, he goes through the drive thru to get his money and then proceeds directly into the neighboring McDonalds drive thru, all while Officer Ryan is urgently trying to get him to go to Target to buy gift cards with the withdrawn money. While at McDs, they forget the straw to his nacho smoothie.
When Richard finally arrives at Target, he sits in the Target parking lot for a while and eats his food, getting a brain freeze and spilling the frozen nacho smoothie all over himself thanks to no straw. He battles a windstorm getting inside the store. He has trouble finding the gift card section so after taking a detour to get some straws, he asks a Target employee (Nevaeh voice) and lets it slip that he's buying cards for the government. She shows him where the cards are before walking away. Officer Ryan pleads with Richard to get Target gift cards, but he doesn’t understand because technically they’re all Target gift cards since they’re sold at Target. Once he figures out the right ones, Richard starts to be paged over the loudspeakers to come to the front desk since Nevaeh alerted someone to the situation. He asks what to do and is told by an increasingly frustrated Ryan to go through the self checkout and purchase the gift cards. Once he does, he sees the store security guard (Jebidiah) and assumes that he and the DEA are working together. The store security guard stops him, talks to Officer Ryan and offers to help with the investigation. Richard suddenly makes a break for it and Officer Ryan hangs up. Richard calls back from a store bathroom stall where he drops one card in the toilet. The Security officer busts in, detains Richard, and jumps on the call where Ryan tries to get him to read the gift card numbers. After getting frustrated, Ryan tells the security officer to take Richard to the station and hangs up. The security officer calls back and Ryan angrily cusses him out.